A New Symptom

Look at my nail bed. You know, where your nail meets the skin. I have a depression there. I'm sure it signifies some nutrient deficiency. I don't care about my nails at all (they used to be strong and long). They are short and brittle. What I don't like is how it indicates that my body is not okay. I can't just take multivitamins, or iron, or whatever I want because it interacts with my meds. I learned this the hard way. So, I am seeing a naturopath, who is apparently very good with thyroids, and I'm hoping that things will improve. I hate that it is not covered, well, sorry, $25 is covered. LAME. Oh well, better than nothing. I see him Monday!!!

My eyes have not gotten better or worse over the past week. I am learning how to cope. I use my lubricants and artificial tears, I wear hats and glasses, and I stay away from bright lights. Oh my goodness, I think a week ago I was holding the light meter with our studio lighting and Gary set it off while my eyes were still open. Terrible, terrible pain. As long as I can still do photography, I will not complain....too much. I was supposed to see the ophthalmologist for Graves in FEBRUARY but I said two months was too long so I'm seeing a coworker of his in 2 weeks!! Woohoo!! I hope I wasn't annoying, I called there two times about their wait list etc. I'm not messing with my health. I will do whatever it takes to get as good as possible.

(Eyes have not gotten worse...below)

Below is my `going out' wear. I wear glasses inside the stores and so far no one has said anything. Phew. The other day Gary came home and I was watching tv in the dark, with sunglasses on. I felt quite pathetic. At least he said I was cute. It just sucks that 90% of my social life (getting out) involves visiting specialists or doctors or BC Biomedical. I mean, they're nice, but still, that's not really cool. Can you think of anything fun to do that doesn't involve light or eyes? Books on tape maybe? Don't mention any bedroom stuff, that was Gary's suggestion. Thanks, dear.

I know things could be worse. I'm scared they will get worse. My goiter has grown and my neck is so sensitive. This is tough with two rambunctious boys. I can't believe I have a life long disease. I never expected this. I expected cancer. No, that wouldn't be better, I know. I'm sure I'll get it anyways. I'm not being pessimistic, just realistic. Both of my parents had it and my mom died of it.

Once a week, I'm like `Okay, as long as it stays like this, I will be happy and enjoy life, just like before' and then another symptom comes. Grrrrrrrr. I really, really do not want to get depressed about this. I really, really need to maintain a positive mindset.

Later this weekend, I am going to post a `Friends and Family; What to Know' kind of post. Things that I would like everyone to know about Graves' Disease and how to support me. So, check back:)